Last week Margie and I spent a few days down in the Bahamas. During a conversation with the general manager of the hotel, we learned their buildings had sustained quite a lot of damage as a result of Hurricane Irma in 2017. His story of how the staff and management worked together to get things back to normal and how they helped each other get through that tough time was inspiring.
Right now they are in another tough situation—they have learned the hotel may be sold but they know nothing about the buyers or whether their jobs will still be there. Once more they’re all facing the unknown together. Margie suggested to the manager that I could hold a session for them all the next day and the manager enthusiastically agreed.
When I was getting myself ready to speak to the hotel staff, I thought about how it might be uplifting for them to have an outsider—someone who isn’t emotionally involved—come in and give them a little boost with some humor and encouragement. So, I started off with an exercise I learned from Tony Robbins that our trainers sometimes use as an ice breaker.
I had everyone in the room stand up. I said, “I want you to walk around and greet as many people as possible as if you were looking for somebody much more important to talk to.” I gave them all a minute or two. The sound in the room was a low rumble of mostly quiet voices. Then I got their attention and said, “Now I want you to go around and greet as many people as possible as if they were a long-term friend that you were excited to see.” The energy level in the room suddenly shot up and the sound was deafening! The mood had instantly shifted from somber to exuberant.
The point is this: when the thing we are focusing on changes, our energy changes. We can sit around and worry about a bad situation that might (or might not) get worse—or we can focus on what we can accomplish when we work together toward the same goal. I pointed out to this group that they had already proven they could accomplish anything, and that they can do it again. They know their strengths and they can encourage each other, empower each other, and lead each other through tough times. My message lifted their spirits.
By changing your focus from negative to positive, you can do the same. When have you changed your focus and allowed your energy to help you through a tough time? I’d love to read your response in the comments below.
Have a great week!
Years ago I learned a very important lesson from Dr. Norman Vincent Peale. He explained to me that we all have two selves. One is an external, task-oriented self that focuses on getting jobs done, while the other is an internal, thoughtful, reflective self. If we let the task-oriented self rule our lives, we might accomplish many tasks—but we won’t be leading a balanced, values-based, fulfilling life. Making more time in your day for the thoughtful self will actually help you accomplish more while reducing stress.
Think about which self wakes up in the morning. Of course, our external task-oriented self wakes up first—usually to an alarm clock. Think of what an awful term that is—an ALARM clock! My friend pastor John Ortberg thinks we should call it the opportunity clock, or the it’s going to be a great day clock. Wouldn’t that give everyone a more positive perspective and outlook?
So the alarm goes off and you leap out of bed and you’re into your task-oriented self. You’re trying to eat while you’re washing, and you’re checking your email as you get dressed. Then you jump in the car and you’re on your speaker phone while you’re driving. Next, you’re going to this meeting and that meeting and running from here to there. Finally, you get home at eight or nine at night. You’re absolutely exhausted, so when you fall into bed you don’t even have energy to say goodnight to someone who might be lying next to you. And the next morning—bang!—the alarm goes off and you’re at it again. I call that leading a busy life, but not necessarily a balanced, peaceful, or thoughtful life.
There is a way to break this cycle. We all need to find a way to enter our day slowly so that we can awaken our reflective self first thing in the morning. The way for some people to do it will be exercise, and for others reading, meditating, or journaling. I put together a booklet of favorite inspirational quotes that I read in the morning. It only takes a few minutes to read and it helps me begin my day with a positive and happy perspective. Instead of immediately doing activities I can check off a task list, I’m able to be thoughtful about how I approach each task. I can prioritize easier, be more creative, and eliminate a lot of stress this way. I even have more time for the most important activity of all—spending time with loved ones. And what’s better than that?
By entering my day slowly, I find it easier to focus on the important things and have more energy to face challenges. It has worked for me, my family, and friends—I urge you to give it a try.