Don’t be a Passive Victim

There is a Positive Psychology course that Margie and I have been taking that is really interesting. We ran into a guy named Nathaniel Branden, who wrote about the six pillars of self-confidence. His big theme is nobody’s coming. If you are thinking about someone who is going to get you out of a situation, and you’re waiting for them to take all the action, the reality is that people can do things, but nobody is really coming. What are you going to do?  One thing that’s interesting is the difference between passive victims—people who are in a situation and immediately go to self-pity—“This is really tough.” Then they want to point fingers and blame other people. This leads to frustration, and eventually anger, and things kind of spiral down that way. This is the passive victim that somehow thinks their fate is in somebody else’s hands, versus the active agent who takes action—“Okay, this is tough, but what am I going to do? What can I do in my area? What ideas do I have?”  They are willing to take responsibility, which is being able to respond, and give suggestions that will help. They have a feeling of confidence—“Somehow we’re going to make it through this thing together.” This leads to hope and optimism. We all need to take action—what can we do to help?  Let’s work on responsibility. I have confidence and hope. What is it that makes some people be able to pull out of tough times? It’s all about resiliency. So remember—we’re all responsible somewhat for the condition we’re in. So be an active agent, not a passive victim. Life is a very special occasion. Don’t miss it with a lot of negative energy.

6 thoughts on “Don’t be a Passive Victim

  1. Great article! I work for a technology staffing firm, and there’s nothing that’s more of a turn off to potential employer than a person who needs others to make things happen. It sounds corny, but the “can-do” attitude always wins!

  2. This reminds me of a quote from one of my favorite movies, “Shawshank Redemption”. Tim Robins character said “it’s time to get busy living or get busy dying.” I have found this to be very motivating.

  3. Gung Ho was certainly the best book I’ve read in class.

    I’ve learned more on working together efficiently than I have on personal finance, the latter of which is the name of the class.

    I look forward to any similar books you may publish in the future.


    Terrence Singh

  4. This post reminds me of the self-esteem part of Gung Ho! As self-esteem rank in the emotion category as high as love and hate, it is pertinent for associates to hold a high self-esteem. If the individual doesn’t believe within their self, the with hold the “can’t do” theology to heart and look to others to either blame or for assistance. Self-confidence leads individuals to believe that their actions leave an impact, and any impact left makes a difference. This is extremely important and relevant to the above blog post as self-confidence and postivie psychology directly correlate.

    -Brandon S.

  5. Pingback: Don’t be a Passive Victim | Happy, shiny, smiley

  6. Pingback: Taking Responsibility | Happy, shiny, smiley

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