When reprimanding, what you do is often not as important as what you don’t do. Since no one really enjoys a reprimand, it’s easy for people to be put on the defensive when receiving criticism. I suggest remembering these “don’ts” when you must reprimand an individual. If you don’t observe these points, you may find that people become less concerned with listening to you and more concerned with fighting you off. Continue reading
Honesty
Season of Service
In San Diego we’re in the middle of a six-month “Season of Service” movement with businesses, civic agencies, and churches all pitching in with community volunteers to serve others. For years I’ve been dreaming about how we can make San Diego a servant leadership town – how in the near future people will come here and say, “What an amazing place to live—just look at the way government and business and education and neighborhoods interact – everyone seems to be out to serve each other and solve problems, not to be self serving.”
My larger dream is that leadership throughout the world will be composed of people who lead at a higher level and, in the process, serve first and lead second. That’s a really tall order, and I might sound like a dreamer. But read this wonderful quote from Harriet Tubman:
“Every great dream begins with a dreamer.
Always remember, you have within you
the strength, the patience, and the passion
to reach for the stars to change the world.”
Why not? What do you want to do to change the world? Remember, you can do it by the moment-to-moment interactions with your family, your friends, your colleagues, and everyone you meet. What’s your dream for changing the world? Go ahead, be a dreamer!
Everyone’s a Coach
In the book Everyone’s a Coach that I wrote with Don Shula, we came up with an acronym that may really help you think about how you’re doing as parents and managers and volunteers in the community. You can use this in just about any area of your life.
- C stands for Conviction-Driven: Do people understand what your values are and where you’re going? Because leadership is about going somewhere. Lead with conviction.
- O stands for Overlearning: There’s no such thing as teaching a good thing too much. You want to prepare your people so much that they really know their responsibilities and they can make something good happen. It’s important to keep telling your people and your kids and anyone else you may have influence over: If you’re going to do something, do your best.
- A stands for Audible-Ready: Don’t get stuck with a plan if for some reason it’s not working. Let people bring their brains to work; let your kids use their brains, too. Be open to the thoughts of others. Be ready to change your mind if a new and better idea comes along.
- C stands for Consistency: This isn’t about behaving in the same way all the time; it’s about behaving the same way in similar circumstances. Be consistent. Praise progress and cheer people on when they’re doing well. If there’s a problem, you can redirect them and get them back to their goals. If it’s somebody who’s dragging their feet who knows better, give them a little one-minute reprimand that will get their attention. But always end it with a reaffirmation that you know they’re better than that.
- H stands for Honesty-Based: This one is all about walking your values. Act with integrity at all times.
This is a wonderful little checklist for all of us in terms of: Are we leading with conviction? Are we really trying to always do our best? Are we adaptable and innovative and ready to change? Are we consistent in our behavior and are we walking our talk? Something to think about this week.
How We Lead 