You know, I think sometimes you really can make your dreams come true. Margie has often said, “A goal is a dream with a deadline.” As you think of your New Year’s resolutions, go ahead and dream about the person you want to be or the thing you want to do. When you start to send energy out to dream, people just may show up in your life to help you accomplish it. That’s what happened when Spencer Johnson and I wrote The One Minute Manager. In May 1982, the book was coming out and in September, Spencer Johnson and I met at the La Jolla Cove. We had The New York Times book review section and a bottle of champagne, and we set our goals and our dreams for this book. We dreamed that we would be able to sell 500,000 copies—no business book had ever sold that many—and we dreamed that it would be on The New York Times bestseller list for six months. We celebrated, we clicked the glasses as we were sitting there with the bestseller list, and it was just really a fun time. This was on a Sunday. On Monday I was getting on a plane in San Diego going to Chicago, and I introduced myself to the guy sitting next to me in First Class. I said, “What do you do?” and he said, “I’m a regional sales manager for B. Dalton.” I said, “You sell books?” and he said, “Sure, we have 750 stores.” And I started talking to this guy and I designed a whole strategy to get to the business and economic buyers of B. Dalton and Waldenbooks and all the bookstores. And I said to this guy, “You weren’t supposed to be sitting here, were you?” and he said, “How did you know that? They goofed up my ticket and at the last minute I was upgraded to First Class.” I said, “You had no choice. I sucked you into this seat with the energy from my dream and our vision about this book.” So dream big in 2010! And let other people know what your dream is so that maybe they can help it come true. Have a wonderful dreaming year and let’s see what kind of things you can accomplish at work and at home and in the community. Be the best you can be in 2010.
Happiness
Have a Merry Christmas!!
The other day, I had a really interesting conversation. I spent time with Robert Strock, who is an incredible psychiatrist, and my friend Phil Hodges. One of the things we talked about that was fascinating was the theory that anger really comes from hidden sadness. If somebody is upset with you, rather than coming back with anger and being upset as well, try this: Quiet yourself, get out your servant heart, and see if you can find out what’s really causing that energy. It’s like peeling back an onion.
So this holiday season, with everybody running around and getting stressed, if somebody gets upset, just quiet yourself and ask if there is anything you can do to help. Just be there for the person and really try to find out where the sadness is coming from. Life is really very interesting if we really take time to get to know each other and be with each other. So hug somebody this weekend and tell them you love them. Take care, and have a Merry Christmas!
How to Deal with Problems
This morning I was listening to Tony Robbins. I went and got a tape of Tony after being with him recently. He was saying a lot of people acquaint happiness with having no problems. He says that’s crazy. It reminded me of one of Norman Vincent Peale’s favorite stories. Norman was walking down the street in New York City when he ran into a friend of his and said, “How are you doing?” Norman thought it was just a casual greeting, but the guy took it as an invitation and he lay down all of his problems at Norman’s feet. After about twenty minutes, he was finished and he said, “Norman, if you can solve all of my problems, I’ll give you a check for $5,000 to give to your favorite charity.” Norman said that he had never turned down such a challenge, so he ruminated and he cogitated and he agitated and he came up with a solution. He said, “I was just at an organization the other day where people have no problems. Would you like to go there?” And his friend said, “That’s exactly where I want be.” And Norman said, “I’ll take you there tomorrow. It’s called Woodlawn Cemetery. The only people I know who have no problems are dead.” Problems are a way of life, so if you equate your happiness to not having any problems, you’re going to be naïve for the rest of your life. Happy people know how to deal with problems. They don’t get bogged down with problems. They solve problems. They work on problems. But they don’t let problems take over their life. You know, sometimes you put a problem on your back and it drags you down. What you have to do is to say, “How do I solve this?” Happiness and problems go together. So as Tony said, it’s your attitude—it’s what you bring to a problem—that can result in a positive solution, So if you have any problems today, great! You’ll probably have a happier day.
Catch People Doing Things Right – Twitter Contest!
You know, one of the things that bugs me is how much the press goes too far in trying to catch people doing things wrong and find out where they stumbled, where they’ve made mistakes. It seems to be relevant now with the Tiger Woods saga, but this “gotcha” mentality is something that has been going on for a long time. It doesn’t matter what position, what office, what they’re trying to do. They love to make sure they can dig somebody a hole and try to push them into it.
I heard a great quote the other day that originally came from Teddy Roosevelt. He said, “It is not the critic who counts; not the person who points out how strong people stumble, or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the person who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; because there is no effort without error and shortcomings; but who does actually strive to do the deed; who knows the great enthusiasm, the great devotion, who spends himself in a worthy cause, who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement and who at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly. So that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.”
So it’s really tough. Like I say, if you’ve never made a mistake in your life or done anything stupid, then you probably lie about other things, too. The important thing is not doing a stupid thing, but realize when you’ve done it and own up to it, give an apology, and move on. I think it would be really good if we could spend more time catching people doing things right rather than wrong. So take care of yourselves. You might make a mistake, but give it your best.
I’ve always enjoyed and promoted the concept of “Catching People Doing Things Right,” and over at LeaderChat.org they are running a new Twitter contest…
Starting on Tuesday and lasting for 72-hours, The Ken Blanchard Companies will give you a chance to “catch someone doing things right” by entering that person in a drawing for a copy of one of my latest books. The book will contain a personalized inscription congratulating the winner on being caught doing things right. The contest ends on Friday at 10:00 a.m. Pacific Time and you can enter as many people as you would like. Here’s how to participate:
1. Go to www.Twitter.com and post the name of the person you would like to catch doing things right along with a very short description of why. Include the following code in your message @leaderchat
For example: Nick Peterson—for doing an outstanding job all year and helping to make this our best year ever! #@leaderchat
2. Push the UPDATE button!
It’s as simple as that. Every day between now and Friday we’ll randomly choose one lucky person among those entered to receive one of the personalized books. Each day’s winner will be posted at 10:00 a.m. Pacific Time at www.leaderchat.org
Don’t miss this chance to say “thank you” to someone who really deserves it. Participating is a fun, low-cost, and very thoughtful way to let someone know that you appreciate them!
PS: If you don’t have a Twitter account yet, you can sign up at Twitter when you get there. Just follow the instructions and you’ll be online in minutes.
Make Love Your Goal for the Holidays
You know, at this time of year you can really get yourself hassled. You know, running around, making sure you have every present bought and everything done and all that. And life can be a burden rather than a joy. This is supposed to be the season of joy and love, not of burden and hassle and all those kinds of things. It doesn’t mean that you don’t want to get things done and cross things off your list, but don’t make “list accomplishment” the goal of this holiday season. Make LOVE the goal of this holiday. If you couldn’t find the right present for someone – maybe you should sit down and write that person a note about how much you care about them and that you’ll send them something after the holidays. Stress is a major problem this time of year because people have so many “to do” lists. They forget why they’re doing it and get too much into the doing. Too often this time of year we’re human doings rather than human beings. I just wanted to check for you, as well as myself as I run around and try to get things done at the end of the year, that I’m a human being, not a human doing. So reach out to anybody you talk to and wish them the greatest holiday, the greatest the greatest New Year, and just tell them you care about them. Maybe that’s what you ought to do. What I like to do this time of year, too, is to go through my phone list and call people I haven’t talked to in a while, and just tell them I care about them. What can you do to make this a joyous time, rather than a hassled time? Remember, life is a very special occasion if you keep things in perspective.
How We Lead 