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The world is in a desperate need of a different leadership role model. Everyone has seen the effects of self-serving leaders in every aspect of our society. What we need today are leaders who are servant leaders.
When people hear the phrase servant leadership, they are often confused. They immediately conjure up thoughts of the inmates running the prison, or trying to please everyone. Others think servant leadership is only for church leaders. The problem is that they don’t understand leadership. They think you can’t lead and serve at the same time. From my experience, not only is it possible, it’s the only way over the long run to get great performance and human satisfaction. To prove my point, I’m always looking for good servant leader examples.
As an ex-basketball player and coach, I love March Madness and the NCAA basketball run. This year was especially sweet with Coach John Calipari leading his Kentucky Wildcats to the National Championship. I have known Cal since his coaching days at the University of Massachusetts. He considers me part of his “kitchen cabinet.” What I admire most about Cal is that he is a classic servant leader. He proves season after season that you can lead and serve at the same time if you understand the three aspects of servant leadership: the servant, the steward, and the shepherd.
As a servant, Coach Cal realizes that leadership is not about him; it’s about the people he is serving. When asked how he felt about winning the championship, Cal was quick to say, “This is not about me. This is about these thirteen players. This is about the Big Blue Nation.” He always focuses on the kids and the fans who support the Wildcats.
As a steward, Coach Cal knows that he doesn’t own these kids—they are “on loan” to him to nurture, support, and help develop. Some people criticize him because a number of his players are “one and done”—they leave after their Freshman year and go straight into professional basketball. Last year, four members of his team were drafted in the first round and this year there likely will be two. He is pushing the NBA to not draft any college players until they have completed a minimum of two years of college. Whatever Coach Cal does, though, it’s all about his kids and what’s best for them and their families. If he feels a player such as Terrence Jones is not ready for the pros after one year, he encourages the player to stay—which is what Terrence did. The Terrence Jones who played in the Final Four this year was very different from the Terrence Jones who played last year. Coach Cal does whatever he can to help each player develop to his own highest level of performance.
As a shepherd, Coach Cal thinks every one of his players is important. This year’s team had six players who averaged 25 points or better in high school—in other words, they were all stars. The great gift that Coach Cal has is to get them to subvert their ego and realize that “none of us is as smart as all of us.” Different players in every game stepped up when they needed to. Anthony Davis, who was chosen the most outstanding player in the NCAA Final Four tournament as well as being the recipient of several National Player of the Year awards, realized the importance of everyone as well. When he was interviewed after the game about what a great game he had played even though he only scored six points, he said, “Well, it’s not me. It’s these guys behind me. They led us this whole tournament. This whole game, I was struggling offensively, and I told my team, ‘Every time down, you all score the ball; I’m just going to defend and rebound.’” What a great example of everyone depending on each other.
Just think of these young people, who have learned to recognize that:
- As servants, life is not about them but about those whom they serve;
- As stewards, they don’t own anything—everything is on loan and they need to nurture and support what is given to them; and
- As shepherds, every human being is important.
These are life lessons, whether they stay in college one year, two years, or four years.
As Reid Cherner recently said in USA Today, “John Calipari persuaded teenagers to put others first, play unselfishly, and believe the whole is better than the sum of its parts. Every parent of a teen has to be in slack-jawed awe of that.”
Does servant leadership work? You bet it does—and Coach John Calipari proves it. The result is great performance along with great human satisfaction. Not a bad outcome for a servant leader.
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It’s not uncommon after I have given a presentation for someone to say to me, “If only my manager had been here! He (or she) really needed to hear this.” I feel it’s a bit of a cop-out to blame your work problems on others. It’s a safe way of not taking responsibility for your own circumstances and initiative to make things better. The fact of the matter is that, during the span of your career, it’s likely that two out of every three managers will not be very good at the job of managing. Are you going to let that keep you from getting what you want and need in your job?
If you’re going to succeed, you need to train your manager to give you what you need. Fortunately, this is easier than it may sound—perhaps as easy as 1,2,3:
1. Give your manager what he/she needs to be successful. It’s going to be difficult to get your manager to make special efforts to help you if you don’t first show, through your actions, that you are worthy of such special effort. Be responsive both in promptly doing what is asked of you, as well as volunteering to help on special projects and responsibilities. Be proactive, try to anticipate your manager’s needs, and help to meet those needs. Take a moment on occasion to ask what else you could be doing to help out. Your attitude and behavior on this first step paves the way for the next step.
2. Tell your manager what you need from him/her to be successful in your job. After you have confirmed with your manager what is expected of you in your job, state what you’ll need from him/her for you to succeed. This is where your knowledge of One Minute Management can be used to get the results you want. Identify simple, clear, and specific One Minute Goals for each item you will be counting on for your manager to deliver, and then set realistic time frames for when those items can be done.
3. Follow up on 1 and 2. By doing what you say you’ll do, when you say you’ll do it, you will build a reputation for being dependable and responsible. By tactfully following up on items your manager agreed to do, you will build the expectation of reciprocity.
When your manager follows through on a commitment to you, use One Minute Praising to positively reinforce the behavior. I am constantly amazed at how many employees feel that managers don’t need praisings! After all—so goes the logic—that’s why managers are paid more. It’s as if by making more money managers graduate to being appreciated less! Let me let you in on a secret: People are never too old or too high up in an organization to not want praisings—it’s human nature. Everyone likes others to notice things they worked hard to achieve. Give your manager a praising today and see for yourself! And remember to praise progress—don’t wait until something is done perfectly before you say something.
If your manager does not follow through on a commitment to do something for you, you need some subtle form of a One Minute Reprimand. Either reestablish the goal while checking on what you could do to move things along, or redirect your manager’s efforts toward a more feasible and realistic task. Of course, you won’t have the position power to reprimand your manager, but the more you have built your personal power with him/her, the more likely a subtle reminder will work to get things back on track.
So don’t lament that your manager hasn’t created the perfect working environment for you—do something about it! Take control of your work life, and learn how to get what you want from your manager in order to make things happen for you and the company. People who learn the skills of managing up will soon be the ones who move up in today’s organizations.
A lot of people ask me for advice about partnerships. Many will tell me about a “once-in-a-lifetime opportunity” that a friend or associate has shared with them and asked if they’d like to participate. Often, the opportunity involves either investing a significant amount of time or money, or a dramatic shift into a new career path, or both.
My advice to such individuals is simple. First, I often ask them if it is something they really want to do; that is, do they truly enjoy this activity to the extent that they might even consider doing it without pay? For someone to be successful at something, they first need to truly enjoy that activity—otherwise, they are likely not to have enough persistence during times of difficulty. To me, enjoying what you are doing is an acid test in business as well as life. If you are having fun, it’s more likely that you will confuse work with play and that you will be successful at that activity.
Second, whenever considering getting into a partnership, you should always ask yourself the question: “Could either of us do this without the other person?” (Have the other individual in the potential partnership ask the same question.) If either of you answer “yes,” or even “maybe,” seriously reexamine the need for the partnership. If you’re uncertain as to how necessary the other person is in a new venture at the very best of times—the beginning—you will certainly doubt and likely regret your mutual involvement down the line; perhaps sooner rather than later. If there’s a good chance you could do the activity on your own, go for it! Life is apt to be a lot simpler if you do.
In a partnership, both individuals involved need to bring something to the party—and each person needs to recognize and value the other person’s contribution. If the importance of each person’s role isn’t clearly recognized upfront, it most assuredly will be valued even less later. In the event of failure, individuals often are quick to blame the other person for shortcomings. In the event of success, most people are apt to feel the success was mainly a result of their own efforts. These reactions are human nature. A clear initial understanding, agreement, and belief in what each person is contributing to the success of a joint venture will go a long way toward minimizing exaggerated perceptions and expectations of effort and worth at a later date.
Third, a piece of common sense advice I truly believe regarding partnerships is that to be effective you need more than a 50-50 effort of both parties; you need 100-100 percent effort. Both parties need to give the venture 100 percent. Fifty percent effort is only half-hearted! If you are no more excited about the opportunity at hand than to feel you are only responsible for 50 percent of the effort, the partnership is doomed from the start. I feel that 100 percent effort needs to be given 100 percent of the time by both parties in any partnership. Such an all-out commitment forces you to move ahead at full speed in making the venture a success. It forces you to rely on yourself, not someone else, to make things happen. It also affords you the ability to give the other person the benefit of the doubt when his or her effort, interest, or time spent seems to be less than ideal.
I have found that it is many times more difficult to break up a partnership—especially if you want to do so on good terms—than it is to start one. By following these simple rules of thumb, you might save yourself some unpleasantness (and possibly a friend) in the process!
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In San Diego we’re in the middle of a six-month “Season of Service” movement with businesses, civic agencies, and churches all pitching in with community volunteers to serve others. For years I’ve been dreaming about how we can make San Diego a servant leadership town – how in the near future people will come here and say, “What an amazing place to live—just look at the way government and business and education and neighborhoods interact – everyone seems to be out to serve each other and solve problems, not to be self serving.”
My larger dream is that leadership throughout the world will be composed of people who lead at a higher level and, in the process, serve first and lead second. That’s a really tall order, and I might sound like a dreamer. But read this wonderful quote from Harriet Tubman:
“Every great dream begins with a dreamer.
Always remember, you have within you
the strength, the patience, and the passion
to reach for the stars to change the world.”
Why not? What do you want to do to change the world? Remember, you can do it by the moment-to-moment interactions with your family, your friends, your colleagues, and everyone you meet. What’s your dream for changing the world? Go ahead, be a dreamer!
I recently heard a wonderful speaker named David Cook, who is one of the great sports mental coaches in the country. He had a really interesting theory about goal setting that I thought was worth sharing with you. He said when you go to set up a goal, whatever it is, you should try to see that goal in your own mind being accomplished. You need to see the outcome. Then you need to feel what it will be like once you’ve accomplished that particular goal, and get that feeling in mind. And then you need to trust that you’re going to be able to get there. He said the power is in the seeing it and the feeling it, and then just trusting the thing. So if you have a goal, whether it’s a business or personal goal, try to actually see yourself accomplishing it and feel like you’re going to feel once you’ve accomplished it—the smile on your face, the applause from other people, whatever—and then just trust it and set your sights on that goal. I think that is really interesting. In golf, he has a whole bunch of people who have “SFT” on their ball, so when they’re playing golf, they try to see every shot—what kind of shot are they going to hit, where is it going to go, how high and all—then get up and feel it, and then just trust the process. He said it really is amazing how it works on all kinds of goals. I was thinking about the great athletes competing in the Olympics—the ones who win have seen themselves crossing the finish line and accomplishing their goal ahead of time. Then they make their actions consistent with what they are seeing and feeling. I think it’s a really fascinating process: See it – Feel it – Trust it. Isn’t that interesting? Try it on one of your goals today.
Last week and this week we are having a “Blanchard March Madness” tournament here at the corporate office. Last week we had some individual competitions including HORSE and a Sharpshooter tournament, and this week we are having 3-on-3 games. Well, on Thursday we had the finals of the individual competitions, and do you know who won the sharpshooting contest? Yours truly! Ha! I made 16 out of 20 shots from the foul line. What a great time we had, and I couldn’t believe I beat all the youngsters here at the office!
It was interesting. I’m proofreading the second edition of The Mulligan that I wrote with Wally Armstrong, about golf and faith. There’s a lot of mental stuff in there too. Tony Robbins said that if you want to perform well, there are three aspects. One is focus—you have to see yourself doing well. And you know, I used to be a great foul shooter when I was younger, so I just saw myself pouring the shots in. Then Tony said you have to have the physiology—you have to walk like you know what you’re talking about. So when it was my turn, I just walked there like I knew what I was doing. And then Tony said you have to have a routine. So I bounced the ball and tossed it around the same way every time before I went for the shot. So I made 16 out of 20 at the line, which even surprised me.
I also read in there what we wrote about playing NATO golf—Not Attached To Outcome. So you’re not worried about your outcome, you’re just going with the flow. Last week we were at a program called Inspire San Diego. The guy who put it on was Greg Reid, who cowrote a book called Three Feet from Gold, which really built on the ideas from Think and Grow Rich, the classic book by Napoleon Hill. Just listen to this line from Napoleon Hill: “There are many things you cannot control, but you can control the only thing that really matters—your mind and your attitude. External forces have very little to do with success. Those who program themselves for success find a way to succeed even in the most difficult of circumstances. Solutions to most problems come from one source, and one source alone: yourself. You can do it if you believe you can. You control your destiny. Decide to live life to the fullest. You may be three feet from gold.”
That was fun. Life is a very special occasion, don’t miss it!
I have been thinking about how important it is to be caught doing things right. Some people think you have to be careful; you don’t want to praise people too much, because they’re going to get a big head. People don’t get a big head by getting caught doing things right. People get false pride and big heads because they’re not praised enough. And they start to crave it, and they need it, and they start to push and shove for credit. When I was a kid, I was so fortunate, no matter what I did there was always somebody there—my mom or dad or my sister—to give me an “attaboy” and tell me that I did great. I think one of the reasons why I’m able to keep things in perspective, if I happen to achieve anything, and laugh about it, is because I’ve been told I’m okay all of my life. So I don’t really need or crave it or need to push or shove for it. So I just wanted to say to you how important, again, it is to help people who are important in your life and give them an “attaboy” or “attagirl” and tell them that you love them and you care about them. Because what really makes people feel good in the long run is the belief about that. False pride comes when nobody pays any attention to you and you start to wonder if you’re okay. Everybody needs that pat on the back once in a while.
Do you know someone who is an energizer? When somebody is an energizer, when they come in the room, energy starts to increase. People’s energy picks up. Do you know other people who, when they come in, the energy just gets sucked out of the room? Ha! You know, there are people like that. Things just seem down when they come around. And those are the kind of people that you should be nice to, and love them, but don’t hang around them. The question is: Are you an energizer? Does people’s energy increase when you’re with them? When you come home, does the energy pick up or are you the wet blanket that just slinks in? I think it’s so important that you be an energizer and you gather people around you who pick up your energy. Because what really makes organizations great, and families great, is positive energy. And it takes energizers around people to make the energy come out in them, too. So that’s my message today. Be an energizer. When you come in a room, light it up! Make something happen. You don’t have to be an extrovert to do that. Just by your interest and your energy in terms of what you do can make a difference, people can see that, even if you aren’t being Mr. or Ms. Exuberant. Life is about positive energy. So energize people! Energize yourself!
Listen to this definition of excellence: Excellence is the result of caring more than others think is wise, risking more than others think is safe, dreaming more than others think is practical, and expecting more than others think is possible. I just think that is a really interesting thing - think about yourself and how you are doing in a caring scale, how you are doing in the risking scale, how you are doing in the dreaming scale, and how you are doing on the expecting scale. I really think that’s a wonderful definition of excellence. Be excellent today – care, risk, and dream and expect big.
Speaking of excellence… At the University of San Diego, my wife Margie and I teach a course as part of the Master of Science in Executive Leadership program. Our course is “Determining Your Leadership Point of View.” Your leadership point of view is really figuring out who you are as a leader, and sharing it.
There are seven aspects of it:
- Who are the role models you had early in life that impacted your belief about leadership? Most people don’t talk about bosses; they talk about their mother or father, uncle or cousin, teacher or coach—what we call “lifelong leaders.”
- What’s your mission in life? What are you trying to accomplish?
- What are your values – what’s going to guide your behavior?
- Based on those three things, what’s your leadership point of view—what are your beliefs about leading and motivating people?
- What are your expectations of others?
- What do your people expect of you?
- How are you going to walk your talk? How are you going to model what you say you stand for?
It’s a fascinating process. We discuss this in Chapter 15 of Leading at a Higher Level. So if you want to find out more about that, get a copy of that book and read that chapter. If any of you haven’t developed a leadership point of view, I would like to challenge you to develop it. Then sometime, maybe in the first part of next year, sit down with your people and share your leadership point of view with them. Because it really does clarify expectations and who you are. It’s not about weakness; it’s about sharing who you are so other people can share who they are with you. It’s a wonderful process. And remember, it’s not just supervisors that should have a leadership point of view—all of you are leaders in some aspect of your life. You’re a leader as a spouse, as a father or mother, or as a volunteer. Anytime you try to influence the behavior of someone else, you’re engaging in leadership. Where did you get your image of leadership? I challenge everybody to develop and be able to share their leadership point of view.
